I never want to be a parent. People always say “yeah, you say this now, but when you get older…” No. People don’t understand. It won’t happen. If i could get ‘fixed’ tomorrow, I honestly would.
First off, Why have your own kids when there is plently you can save? So many kids without homes, or kids that need better ones. I wouldn’t feel okay putting another person on this earth when there are so many other children I could help.
Second, I hate making people unhappy. I could never look at a kid, and just be mean to it. Or leave it. Or disappoint it. What if I can’t do things that wealthy parents could for it? I grew up with such shitty parents, that took care of thenselves before they took care of me and I never want the chance to be like that to another person. I never want to even come close to it. Things like that run in the family. I could never just leave someone like that because I know when my parents left me, it still hurts to this day. Even having Nugz. I feel bad leaving him when i go to work and such and that is where my third point comes in.
I want to travel. I want to be able to do what I want when I want and have my hard earned money to spend on stuff that I want. And for Nugz. And for Yoav. Im content with our little family. I don’t want to complicat it.
Kids just aren’t going to be apart of my life. I never really got along with them anyways. And if the .5% chance I do end up having kids, feel free to wave this in my face and laugh. I would do that same. But the chances are super slim.
This town was made to leave, and to either be sucked back in, or to be left. I left, but I should have stayed away.
I blame my parents for not wanting to get married or have kids, ever.
Im tired of being tired, and tired of everything. Just tired.